Spring 2011 Shamatha Retreat

This afternoon's session begins with a 50 minute Dharma talk in which Alan Wallace invites us to consider whether we are content, satisfied, perhaps even willing to rejoice in the current trajectory of our individual lives. He talks about balancing between the two extremes of being utterly disappointed with ourselves and being complacent with the way things are. He then explores the possibility of feeling gratitude towards the difficult people and circumstances which have impelled us to this present moment of mudita. The unguided meditation is not included in this recording. Q&A with the group begins at 49:10. 1. Can you talk more about bracketing the practices that you call balancing earth and wind, and earth and sky? What is their source, what is their purpose, and what is the benefit?

In this morning's session we return to the practice of awareness of awareness. Alan first introduces the technique of oscillation between withdrawal from all appearances and release into space, or non-objectivity. The unguided meditation is not included.

This afternoon, Alan first gives a Dharma talk relating to the deepest type of suffering to which we are vulnerable: the pervasive suffering of composite, or conditioned, existence. He asks the question, "Why do we suffer?" and explores it from a theistic, materialistic, and then, in depth, a Buddhist perspective. Finally, he posits that in order to develop compassion for this type of deep suffering, we must believe in the possibility of freedom, and use skillful means to draw in this possibility. The skillful means he describes is the powerful of stage of generation practices from the Vajrayana. Unguided meditation begins at 43:20 in the recording, and the discussion and following Q&A picks back up at 1:10:57. 1. The substrate consciousness is individual, yes? Are the substrate and Buddhanature also individual? 2. When we imagine the Buddha as light, is that symbolic or real?

This morning, Alan first reviews the practice of settling the mind in its natural state, both in theory and in practice. This is followed by an unguided meditation that begins at 12:00 in the recording.

This afternoon, Alan first gives a lengthy Dharma talk about different methods for responding to the reality of change. He contrasts the materialistic and Buddhist views, and goes into detail about how attachment and grasping block one's ability to achieve freedom from the suffering of change. This is followed by an unguided meditation on compassion for the suffering of change. Editor's Note: The unguided meditation and brief Q&A session afterwards are not included in the recording due to a recording error.

Alan first speaks for 15 minutes about the benefits of the practice of settling the mind in its natural state and its use in freeing ourselves from our habitual propensities of craving, aversion, and delusion. He also talks about the skillful use of stage of generation practices in the context of settling the mind in its natural state. The unguided meditation begins at 16:20 in the recording.

Alan begins this afternoon's session with a lengthy dharma talk on cultivating confidence in the practices, now that we have two full weeks of silent retreat remaining. He also sets up today's meditation on compassion for blatant suffering by speaking about different ways of responding to "hedonic distress" and "genuine distress." The unguided meditation on compassion begins at 35:50 in the recording. Alan then answers these questions from the group, which begin at 1:04:30. 1. When we achieve shamatha, what comes next in the hours, days and weeks ahead? When it is achieved, how easy is it to lose? 2. How far from achieving shamatha to the first jhana? What will someone experience when entering the first jhana? 3. Can you talk about lengthening practice sessions? I don't know how to increase without being performance driven.

This morning continues with unguided meditations. Alan first speaks briefly about the tendency to identify with the body and mind as oneself. This practice is particularly effective in eradicating this misunderstanding. It helps us move from, "Buddhanature is something I have, but I'm really screwed up," to, "Buddhanature is who I am, and the mental afflictions come and go." The unguided meditation begins at 10:45 in the recording.

Another unguided meditation this afternoon, first introduced with a description of the obstacle of feeling separate from others, and how this impedes the flow of loving-kindness. The unguided meditation begins at 9:20 in the recording. Alan then answers a number of questions from the group, beginning at 37:35 in the recording. 1. Where does volition reside? It's not there when I look for it. It appears and disappears. 2. In awareness of awareness practice, I bring my attention to the heart chakra. In loving-kindness practice, you talk about the heart. To me that's slightly different. Is there a distinction? 3. When I allow my body to breathe without controlling my breath, it is often shallow and light. The practice of tonglen makes my breathing deeper, and this also happens with other visualization practices. Is this okay? 4. Could you use as an object for shamatha the felt sense loving-kindness in the body? 5. When doing mindfulness of breathing, I still have some chit-chat, some thoughts, and some i

This morning, Alan first reviews the instructions for the third phase of mindfulness of breathing, with the attention placed on the sensations of the breath at the aperture of the nostrils. We then share a 24-minute unguided meditation. Enjoy! Unguided meditation begins at 8:45 in the recording.

This afternoon we continue with unguided meditations. Alan first reviews the meditation on loving-kindness for others in the tradition of Buddhaghosa, first for oneself, then a dearly loved friend, then a neutral person, and finally a difficult person. Alan also invites us to hold space to see who else might arise and attend to them with loving-kindness. The unguided meditation begins at 17:40 in the recording, and Q&A begins at 45:30. This is followed by these practical questions from the group: 1. We have been using the visualization of the orb of light at the heart center. I'm finding that my heart is becoming tender and actually physically sore. I'm wondering if this happens, and whether I might be trying too hard? 2. When balancing earth and sky or earth and wind, do we have to use the infirmary for the earth element, or can we use breathing at the abdomen? 3. Regarding attending to more than one thing at a time. I notice, during meditation, it seems like I am attending to two things at the same

This morning, Alan first reviews the practice of mindfulness of breathing, the second phase, with its emphasis on the somatic sensations of the breath in the abdomen, while maintaining relaxation and increasing stability. This is followed by an unguided 24-minute meditation, and then Alan reminds us to maintain our mindfulness between sessions by bringing our awareness to the breath and the tactile sensations of the body, releasing the flow of conceptual thinking associated with obsessive-compulsive-delusional-disorder. The unguided meditation begins at 8:40 in the recording.

In this afternoon's session, Alan first gives advice on the sleep imbalances that can arise during retreat (or outside of retreat) and introduces us to the practice of "sleepitation" to ground oneself in the earth element and relax deeply when trying to sleep. He then reviews the instructions of loving-kindness for oneself in detail, after which we share an unguided 24-minute meditation on loving-kindness. The unguided meditation begins at 18:40. Q&A begins at 47:15. Alan then answers questions from this morning's practice of mindfulness of breathing, the first stage: 1. In the part of the practice when you feel the breath where it is strongest, for me it is the abdomen. This means the practice feels just like stage two of mindfulness of breathing. Is this right? 2. I've been getting headaches for a few days. I know they are being caused by tension, but I can't find the source of the tension, and meditating in the infirmary does not help. 3. In "The Attention Revolution" you say you should notice if

The next three morning sessions will be unguided meditations on the first three stages of mindfulness of breathing. This morning, Alan first speaks briefly about the importance of the cultivation of relaxation. The unguided meditation (included) begins at 8:00 in the recording. Recording quality improves significantly at 2:00.

In this session, we approach the immeasurable of equanimity from a Mahayana perspective, using the practice of tonglen (sending and receiving) to attend to individual sentient beings. The guided meditation begins at 7:10 in the recording. Alan then answers these questions from the group: 1. What is the relationship between the four immeasurable and bodhicitta? 2. What about dedicating the merit? Do you have any special recommendations in the context of retreat? After each session? At the end of the day? 3. Sometimes I fall asleep lucidly without dreams. Is there a difference between being in a lucid dream, and being asleep lucidly without dreams? Also, last night I became aware of being asleep -- I had my senses, could feel myself breathing, see myself sleeping in my mind's eye. What was happening? 4. You mentioned earlier about how the four immeasurable can balance and complement each other. I love that weaving together. For example, during a meditation on equanimity, I saw indifference coming up, so I

In this morning session, Alan Wallace guides a meditation on the awareness of awareness practice. Today, we intentionally send our awareness above, to the right, to the left, below, to the heart center, and then out into space. The guided meditation begins at 4:22 in the recording.

Alan Wallace begins this afternoon's session with the question, "When a desire arises, how does one know whether it is desire (wholesome) or craving (unwholesome)?" He explores practical answers to this question, then proceeds to a guided meditation on the immeasurable of uppekha, or equanimity, focusing on a Theravaden approach, cultivating an evenness of mental imperturbability, a mind unaffected by mental afflictions. The guided meditation begins at 14:37 in the recording. Afterwards, Alan gives an interesting and engaging answer to this question from the group: 1. Any time I've heard the question, "How or why did ignorance-marigpa begin?" the answer given is that, "It never began; time is beginningless, and the dharmakaya and ignorance have just always existed, neither came first." And then, from the teacher, "And why do you want a beginning or first moment anyway?!" I can accept the notion of beginningless time - ie: present moment arising from the previous ad infinitum, and that from the perspectiv

In this morning session, Alan Wallace guides a meditation of awareness of awareness, focusing on the lived sense, the actual sense one has, of being the witness, or observer, of all that is 'over there' while one feels oneself is 'over here.' The guided meditation begins at 7:26 in the recording.

In this session, Alan Wallace guides a meditation on empathetic joy, emphasizing taking delight and joy in both the causes of genuine happiness and the material fruits of this happiness. In his introduction, he also speaks about the importance and meaning of path, and the question of how to develop a deep enough aspiration to clarify this path. The guided meditation begins at 22:45 in the recording. Alan then answers these questions from the group: 1. In the awareness of awareness practice, you asked us questions this morning, such as, "who do you think you are?" Should I be taking these questions into a contemplation on the spot? 2. When we meditate on an object for a while, and then after some time we fall away from it, should we use effort to bring the object back, or instead relax and trust that the object will return on its own? 3. The Bodhisattva's commitment to stay in this world until all beings achieve enlightenment seems like a kamikaze mission… [This question becomes more of a dialogue.] 4. I

In this morning session, we follow Padmasambhava's teachings in this second phase of the awareness of awareness practice. Our quest is not to look and find nothing, but rather to look for something that does exist: the "lived sense" of "I am the agent." We then scrutinize this sense. Is it authentic or delusional? Does it correspond to an actual agent? The guided meditation begins at 26:10 in the recording.