Your Life On Purpose

On today’s episode, I’d like to share with you one lesson I learned while living like a monk. I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it before on this show, but this last winter I spent a few days at Zen Mountain Monastery in the Catskill mountains living like a monk. During that stay, time slowed down to a caterpillar crawl and days felt like years. In a good way. Why? Because with the monk life, every second seems to be accounted for and everything seems to focus on the present, working to pull in the tangled ball of yarn that makes up our thoughts. Who knew non-thinking could cause time to slow down? I will be short and to the point like the espresso I’m sipping. On this episode, let’s cxplore a bit of zen philosophy to be more present in the moment. We start with a glass of ice cubes. ——- Imagine you’re on a plane and you ask a stewardess for a glass of water. A minute later she comes back with a cup of ice and hands it to you. You have had quite a long day, are tired, and just want some water to cool you down.  

As a kid, I was obsessed with Monty Python’s The Holy Grail. So much so that the obsession grew from clanking together coconuts as a teenager with my buddy Alan to studying Arthurian legend in my college studies. Even my professor thought I was a bit ridiculous. “You’re that kid in high school who would clank coconuts together, right?” she once asked.  And she was right. On a random cycling trip to Barcelona, I discovered that one of our routes outside Barcelona took us through the mountains where the grail is now thought to be buried. Did I look for The Holy Grail then? You betcha. And I seriously thought I found it when I came upon a tiny little 10th century chapel in the Pyrenees. But Alas, there was no grail to be found. I am one of many intrigued by the grail, however. The Holy Grail has been an obsession for questers throughout all of history. The Knights Templar searched high and low for The Holy Grail during The Crusades and Cistercian Monks rifled through ancient texts to search for clues, as well.  

I write this episode as the rain pelts the airport tarmac outside as I sit here ready to board my plane home from a weekend trip in Charlotte. Before I do that, I’d like to share a few thoughts on being authentic in our speech and living the art of truthfulness. Grab your cup of coffee and join me. And oh yeah….quick note… be careful with flying with a hand coffee grinder. You should have seen the look on the TSA employee’s face when, after checking my bag, she pulls out the grinder with a quizzical look, opens it, and then smelled the delicious fresh coffee beans inside. I offered to make her a cup, but alas...she had work to do. But, I digress... -------------------- Have you ever found yourself biting your lip, holding back what you really wanted to say, but held back for one reason or another? Telling the truth and being honest in our communication can be as difficult as holding sand in our hands. Squeeze the hand too hard and it hurts. Too light and sand falls swiftly through the fingers. Like riding a r

On this episode, I’d like to thank the squirrels outside my window for reminding me of a little old gent who built a shanty and pissed off the government back in the 1800s. Yes, I’m talking about Henry David Thoreau who spent his days sitting in his little cabin in the woods on Walden Pond. And yes, that guy seriously loved squirrels. I precisely remember reading his book Walden ( which is a fantastic read by the way that you should check out) and for two whole pages the dude talks about squirrels scampering across the snow. Ridiculous? Perhaps. But you can also look at it from another point of view. Thoreau focused on the minutia and the beauty of the small things in front of us. And that my friends is what I’d like to talk about. Let’s talk about the 1 sign you’re creating work that matters... After attending Harvard in the 1800s, Thoreau did the exact opposite of what one was supposed to do. While other educated men followed the well-trodden path of medical school or law studies, Thoreau grabbed a hammer,

You’re listening to Your Life on Purpose:  the podcast that helps  you feel less like a cog in a machine by connecting the dots between life, your passions, and what the world needs, all in under ten minutes.   Music I’m your host Mark Guay and welcome my friends to season 2 of Your Life on Purpose. On this episode, I’d like to share with you a story that happened in my life when I went to college. It wasn’t a major event back then, yet now I realize that this small dot in my life significantly altered my way of looking at living my life. Let me take you back: On one blistery fall night, the trees had shed their motley colored leaves and, as chilled air blew throughout the college campus, I walked the two miles back to my dorm room to go to sleep. Before that, however, I did what one shouldn’t do before bed: I checked my digital messages. And as I waited for the archaic clunky desktop computer to boot up Windows XP, I had no idea what would happen next. It was fall semester my sophomore year and I had died. T

On this episode, I’d like to talk about life’s greatest dance and how you can join this tango. Because I see this all the time…. High School degree? Check. Bachelor’s degree? Check. Enrolled in Master’s degree program? If I can’t get a job first, check. Enter the dance and keeping optimism alive. For many, leaving college can be a bit of a downer. It’s easy to lose the optimism that’s the aura of a college campus. Why? For many people -- regardless of age and including myself -- it’s difficult to shift from the safety net of academia to produce work that will get criticized by someone other than a professor. It’s easier to keep our life’s work trapped inside. Because you know… life happens: Raising children, taking care of elderly parents, persevering through an illness -- and then that whole silly trap of  keepin’ up with the Joneses thing. It’s just as easy, fortunately, to maintain this optimism and continue progress with your life’s work. Here’s how. The Need For Unlearning Understand first that you hav

I talk a lot about the power of writing on this show and a lot of you have asked me to dive a bit deeper into how to write, specifically, how we can use writing as a tool to discover the self. Because as Joseph Campbell reminds us: It is by going down into the abyss that we recover the treasures of life. Where you stumble, there lies your treasure. So, that’s what today’s episode is all about. Fifty or so of us sat around the room, ready to begin a group meditation which would be followed by a group writing session. Artists, vagabonds, spiritual warriors of all types, from all over the world, sat around me. Gongs, singing bowls, shamanistic feathers filled the room. The bell chimed, I closed my eyes and up our chakras we climbed as we dove inward to sit with the soul and hold hands with the inner self. Thirty minutes later, the meditation came to a close and from there the writing session began. Those around me scribbled their thoughts on the page in haste. I sat still: frozen by my inner critic. As soon as I

I'm about to venture out to Breakneck mountain to meet with an old friend whom I haven't seen in ten years. I'll be off in the woods for the day, but promise to come back tonight to read your emails. Before I walk into the wild, I want to share with you what I learned from my recent trip back home. I learned the art of direct compassion. ---------------------------- I sat across from my father, stared into his eyes for an entire minute and said three words he hadn't heard a lot while growing up in a dilapidated mobile home park in Buffalo, NY. His eyes teared up and so did mine. I said, “I love you.” A rush of energy flooded through me and my father. Energy that brought the two of us closer together. Energy that helped us both reach deeper into ourselves. You see…. a blue-collar man raised in the smoke of the railroad industry, my father grew up like many men. He learned that in order to get the job done, one must hold in his emotions. Life is hard and thick skin is what gets you through the hardships of life

Today, I’d like to talk about love. No, not the kind of love you’re thinking about. I’m talking about platonic love for the self and others and I learned it while on a yoga and meditation retreat at Blue Spirit in Costa Rica. I just came in from practicing headstand and have poured my second cup of java. Thanks for joining me today. The howler monkeys screamed outside and the humid air hugged my skin like a warm blanket. I sat down and faced a woman who I barely knew and placed my hand on her chest to feel her heartbeat. She did the same and we stared deeply into each other’s eyes for five intense minutes. Sweat began to pour down my face, stinging my eyes and, as my heartbeat grew in intensity, I thought about my wife back home. This is definitely not appropriate, I thought to myself, as intense guilt began to flood my mind. But what followed next surprised me like a rainbow that appears without a cloud in the sky. Such is the nature of a mindfulness retreat in the jungle. I felt intense love for this woman.

Today, I’d like to share with you a story that I haven’t shared with many people. It involves my Placenta, Star Constellations and Ego-less Existence. It’s what I learned while floating in a sensory deprivation chamber for 90 minutes. Here we go: I closed the door behind me and looked down at my new home: a one-foot deep tub of salt water meant to float my body and deprive me of my senses for the next 90 minutes. I laid down in the dense salty tub, ready to float into bliss, as the lights dimmed and the soft music that once filled the room drifted off into the abyss that now enveloped my sight. Utter blackness. Utter silence. Utter weightlessness. I had heard about floatation chambers quite often, as they continue to pop up in cities across the world like the one-time ubiquitous oxygen bars of the 1990’s. But unlike the O2 bars which promised a bit of relaxation, floatation chambers (a.k.a. sensory deprivation chambers) are said to offer unparalleled relaxation, detoxification, and a trip into the realms of h

Yoda the cat keeps jumping on my lap with his mouse toy as we play fetch and I keep reminding him that it’s Your Life on Purpose work time. But he doesn’t seem to understand, so if you hear a mouse squeaking toy, that’s him saying hello. I just poured a delicious cup of coffee and am thinking of my students who -- about to enter their last year of school- are struggling to find clarity in their life’s direction. Today’s episode is all about finding clarity. Because, let’s face it: we all feel a little lost at some point in time. I know I have before and it’s led to some of my favorite memories. It turns out, however, that this is a good sign. It’s a sign that we are pushing ourselves beyond status quo and hearing what Joseph Campbell calls “The Call to Adventure” or as I like to call it, The Call to Purpose. It’s an inward journey. One that does slay dragons, meets mystical maidens and knights, and takes one far beyond the earlier reaches of adolescent maturity. It’s one’s collective evolution into a higher f

I have to be honest. Many times I find myself so caught up in the future that I forget all that I already have with me. Yesterday was one of those days where I drifted from a mindset of gratitude: — As the beautiful Hudson Valley sun shone on my face, I couldn’t help but think about the beaches of Kauai once again. — I did my first press into handstand last night, but I barely acknowledged this physical feat. Instead, I immediately thought about how one day I’ll be able to do what that Cirque Du Soleil guy on Instagram does in a one-hand handstand. — When I scrolled through the internet to complete some much overdue work, advertisements callously reminded me that I don’t have enough and that I need that new gadget, a slimmer waistline, or a new job to get me to where I need to be in life to be truly happy. And this happens over and over. Yesterday wasn’t the first time. I’ve learned that it takes a conscious effort to focus the attention inward. Happiness is not something “out there” as the media overtly sugg

I’d like to share a quick story about climbing fish and transformation. Not too long ago, my good friend Phil tried something in New York that no one has done before. He created a website that would connect people based on the books that have inspired them with the only requirement to meet for a conversation. The idea came out of Einstein’s quote: “If you ask a fish to climb a tree, he’ll spend his whole life believing that he’s an idiot.” I took part in the experiment and every week, I rode the train into New York City to enjoy a cup of coffee with a wide-range of people: some straight out of college, some homeless, some millionaires, and many in their 30s who took a chance on a major career shift. They shared their stories of transformation and their dreams for the future. One went from English teacher to Broadway producer, another from T-Shirt Designer to a world-traveling photographer, and then there was a photographer who hung up the camera to start a magazine company. The only constant was change. These

I just returned from a New York City and wanted to share with you a quick story. It involves a Jungian analysis workshop that I took part in and a sailboat. —————- I must confess: I’m a recovering daydreamer. All my life, I’ve struggled to focus in on the present because my mind so quickly would drift to Neverland. In school, at work, in yoga class, in flight — these are just a few of the many times my mind has wandered. Living in the present — to “be here now” — is the core of living mindfully. It turns out, however, that while tuning into the present is important, it’s also helpful to tune into the images that arise from our unconscious selves: in daydreams, dreams, or images that arise during a form of exercise like yoga. What I’d like to explore with you today is what I learned in a Jungian analysis workshop I attended in New York and led by certified Jungian analysts, Morgan and Jenn Stebbins. Based off of Carl Jung’s exploration of the unconscious, I’d like to leave you with three helpful steps to use

So, many of you know that I recently received my 200 hour yoga teacher certification over a 6 month intensive training regiment. And I’d like to share with you something I learned through my experience of spending months twisting and lengthening my body so that I looked more like Gumby. This story is about finding balance, literally and figuratively in our lives. It’s so easy to go the extremes of lethargy or overdoing it. The middle path is always a lot freakin harder (well, for me at least) I laid on my back in a spinal twist to the left and breathed deep to stretch as far as I could. I had just committed to my yoga journey and gosh darn-it, I was going to be a real yogi. My instructor came over and offered an assist. With a grunt, I said yes. She helped me twist deeper and, after three deep breaths, I had twisted so much that I envisioned my body to look like Da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man from above. I could go deeper. More, more, more — my mind screamed. So I grunted some more, squeezed my abs, and forced a de

The air smells of suntan lotion and barbecue sauce and after spending the majority of the past day walking through an outdoor sculpture park these words from Michelangelo continue to swirl in my mind. He once wrote when asked about his sculpting: “The marble not yet carved can hold the form of every thought the greatest artist has.” “The marble not yet carved can hold the form of every thought the greatest artist has.” Let’s dissect Michelangelo’s words and talk a bit about creating art. I mean, what does creating art mean anyway? I just poured some fancy Kauai peaberry coffee and am enjoying the sweet maple syrup that a student gifted me before the close of the  past school year. I’ll confess… I may (okay I do) work too much. I’m either writing something, teaching something, or thinking of something work-related. But a recent conversation with my friend Vlad at the Stormking Art Center in New York — a wide expansive field where gigantic abstract sculptures contrast with the rolling hills of the Hudson River

3 Ways to Find Focus Amid Distraction It’s a holiday weekend in my local village as I sit here and record this podcast. In just a few hours fireworks, BBQs, and picnics will have dot the streets like stars in a country sky. It’s quite a beautiful display of community pride and family love, yet as much as I tried to plan ahead, I still find myself with some work I need to finish before diving into the festivities. Does this ever happen to you? Perhaps if you work from home like I do much of the year, you also struggle with finding work/life balance when there isn’t a clear punch-in/punch-out clock. So, how does one find focus amid the Sirens of distractions? Turn Off Media and Multitask No-More There’s no such thing as background noise. There’s noise and then there’s silence. If the television is on and a person is on the phone, for instance (like I caught myself doing yesterday), the mind struggles to find clarity. Background noise turns mindful thinking into white noise confusion. Multitasking is dead. Tun

As the school bells begin ringing for the start of another school year, let’s pause for a moment and think about something that we often don’t reflect on. Just what is school for? Is it to get a job? To evolve our brain? To connect with other intellectuals? Or what? We’ve built a culture that sends its children to school for, at minimum, 20 percent of their life expectancy and we value education on a beautiful visceral level. We’re willing to spend more on a college tuition than a home mortgage without the guarantee that a degree will even put a roof over our heads. But do we ever stop to really consider, what is school for? So I’d like to begin that conversation and ask you: What do you think school is for? Just leave a comment below or reach out at mark@yourlop.com. *** A Brief History of School   We hunted and gathered as storytelling animals and schooled each other around the campfire. Our grandparents were our teachers. Then we developed more nuclear families and farmed. School was in the home or in a co

What Blake Teaches Us About Living On Purpose It’s a beautiful day here in New York and as I sip an overly sweetened espresso with chaga mushroom (yes, I know, I’m knew to chaga too for its health properties so we’ll see if I get really goofy at the end of this podcast). I’ve been reading through my old poetry books and  I’d like to share with you some thoughts and reflections on William Blake’s work. When I was in college, Blake’s work taught me a lot about what it means to truly live life on purpose. ——- Now famed writer, poet, painter, and philosopher, when William Blake picked up a pen or a paintbrush, he got about as much recognition for his work as a squirrel does for digging up an acorn. The man died without a clue as to how much influence his work would eventually carry. Now, just walk down the halls of any college literature or philosophy wing and you’ll likely hear a reference to Blake. He’s often stated to be one of the most influential romantic poets of all time. Largely criticized and often viewe

Wake Up in 60 Seconds It’s amazing how the mind works, right? One moment we can be angry and pissed off; in another, happy and gregarious. One moment we can sick; In another, healthy. Take, for instance, the last time I acted on stage. I had just come down with a delicious case of the flu and couldn’t hold down my lunch for the life of me. My roommates stayed far away from me lest they too come down with this stomach bug. How, for the life of me, would I play a carefree and bubbly college student on stage that night? And the kicker… my character was the proverbial 30-year old who still lived at his parents’ home and comes home drunk to devour a plate of cold Spaghettios live on stage. Yes, a plate of cold spaghetiios. Now, if you don’t know what spaghettios are, imagine finding a very old can of spaghetti with meatballs and tomato sauce. Not exactly the kind of thing you want to eat or even see when you’re down with the flu. Minutes before the spotlight would shine on me that night, I imagined all the terribl