March Bradness

All the Pretty Horses is a novel written by Cormac McCarthy about a young Texas ranch hand. It's also an audiobook – and guess who narrated it. No, it's not Matt Damon (although he did star in the movie). No, it's not Obama (good guess). Alright, we'll just tell you. It's a young, scrappy, straight-outta-the-wild-west... Brad Pitt.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Get ready for our youngest, fastest pitting yet. Brad Pitt in Across the Tracks just wants to get a track scholarship to Stanford. Brad Pitt in Cutting Class wears double collars and just wants to make out with his girlfriend. Both face obstacles – some more deadly than others. Meanwhile, Hannah gets a text from her dental hygienist, and Sarah spends a lot of time cackling.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Word on the street is that Tiffany Haddish met Brad Pitt in an elevator, where he told her he's taking a year-long vow of celibacy. Is it true?? Could it be?? Resident Brad experts Hannah & Sarah weigh in. Plus... World of Warcraft? Can monks jerk off? And other important questions.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

It's here... it's sweaty... it's got no shirt on... it's Brad Pitt in Fight Club. It's ALSO Brad Pitt in Kalifornia. Tyler Durden goes up against Earl the serial killer in a battle of the Brad's. We hope you're ready to find out the winner – and this time, we have scorecards, so it's official.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Folks... we're about to shake things up a bit. After a bit of advice from friend-of-the-show Alex Blumberg, we're making things official with scorecards. Are we finally defining Bradness? Will Brad's butt have an effect on the final decision? The answers... may surprise you.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Johnny Suede goes up against True Romance in a battle of the slackers. In Johnny Suede, Brad Pitt stars as a struggling musician who just can’t get his act together despite his perfectly coiffed hair. In True Romance, Brad appears as a well-meaning stoner who keeps wrecking everyone’s plans. Only one will bumble his way to the finish line.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

We made this joke last week – and as you know, we're VERY dedicated to following through on jokes. It's why this podcast exists. So join us this week we ponder the question: If Brad Pitt was a frog, kind of frog would he be?  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

It's Patrick Dempsey madness this week on March Bradness. Is he McDreamy or McSteamy? Is Sarah a massive Drarry shipper? How many monkeys are even in Twelve Monkeys? Plus – we talk about Brad Pitt a little.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

It's not a journey. Every journey ends, but we go on. The world turns and we turn with it. Plans disappear... dreams take over. That's right... we're talking about Brad Pitt's Chanel No. 5 ad. And we're pitting it against his Pringles commercial – because why not?  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Controversy strikes again this week. The divorce can be seen in Brad Pitt's eyes in Allied – but Brad is thirsty for an Oscar in Moneyball as he plays Billy Bean, struggling manager of the Oakland Athletics baseball team. Plus: is Brad Pitt a vegan?  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Do you have the fever? The fever for pringles? Brad Pitt sure does. Hannah and Sarah take a look at an early acting gig starring our beautiful boy and a can of America's favorite chips.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

This week, we answer the question you've all been waiting for... WHAT'S IN THE BOX? In Se7en, Brad Pitt goes after a serial killer who turns people into zombies – while in World War Z, Brad fights zombies. Only one Brad will emerge as the victor and move forward in the bracket. Meanwhile, Hannah and Sarah discuss the political implications of zombies, and Hannah goes full film school on David Fincher.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode, Hannah and Sarah explain that Brad Bites are quick episodes, good for 5-minute commutes. Then they launch into a lengthy discussion about the astrological signs of every King of the Hill character – along with the Friends aligment chart, Matt Damon's Arthur appearance, and the inventor of the Speedo.Somewhere along the way, Brad Pitt's performance in King of the Hill ("Patch Boomhauer", SSN8 EP1) is judged against his appearance in Friends ("The One with the Rumor", SSN8 EP9).  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

It's time for.... THE BIG BOYS! Fan-favorite Inglourious Basterds – where Brad plays allied officer Aldo Raine – goes up against Ocean's Twelve, where Rusty Ryan is the thief of our hearts. Last season, Ocean's beat out "Too Young to Die?" – but can Rusty steal the show a second time in a row?  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

WE'RE BACK! Welcome to the start of March Bradness, Season Two – and welcome, new listeners, because we're using this episode as a jumping-off point so you don't have to listen to Season One (although you're more than welcome to). In this episode, we talk about what Bradness is, our findings from Season One, what the show's all about, and some exciting announcements and format changes for Season Two. It's a rip roaring good time.Journalistic integrity alert: although Sarah said that "Obama follows Jack on Twitter" (@ jh_moore) it would appear that the POTUS of our dreams does not, in fact, follow Jack on Twitter. Sarah swears on her life that this was once the case, and wonders what Jack could have possibly posted about sports to prompt an unfollow.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Guys... it's the SEASON FINALE. First, Brad Pitt stars in Cutting Class – an amazingly cheesy 80's slasher flick. Is he the killer or not?! Next up is Contact (1992... not the alien movie) – which we flew to LA to screen at the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences!!! It was awesome. Let us tell you all about it.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Next week is our season finale, but this week, we'd like to tell you about what to expect and when in the upcoming season. Join us as we gaze into the future with Brad Pitt standing behind us, a hand on each of our shoulders, nodding sagely.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Pinch, pinch! It's Brad Pitt as Will the Krill... he's coming to getchya. Will he steal your heart as an actual krill in Happy Feet Two, America's most classic and well-loved animated children's movie? Or will Brad sneak his way to victory as Tom Bishop the spy in Spy Game? It's the prequel to our season finale. You don't wanna miss this.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

In this episode we discuss Brad Pitt being in M. Night Shyamalan’s Signs, but more importantly topics such as: the beefiest boy Hannah would have a crush on, Halloween illnesses, and Brad Pitt’s nipples.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

When we heard Brad Pitt did an Irish accent in The Devil's Own, we were concerned. Are we still concerned? We can't tell you that – it'd spoil the episode. Can Babel talk a big enough talk to give Irish Brad a run for his gold?  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.