The Dating Den

Marni welcomes Dr. Harry Cohen to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into the practice of nurturing traits that make people naturally gravitate towards you. What are these virtues that attract people? Harry is an author, having most recently published the book, “ Be the Sun, Not the Salt''. In this episode, Marni and Harry discuss how to forgive your mistakes and move forward while practicing the authentic virtues that will bring out the best version of yourself and those around you. Are you ready to be the change you wish to see in the world?   *         How to embody virtuous behavior *         Learn from history’s greats *         How to practice apologizing well   How to Level up [13:41]   Seek out and learn from people who exemplify the highest virtues and achievements. By understanding these positive energizers, you absorb their wisdom and integrate those practices into your own life.   Those are exemplars. Those are the people who we intuitively and naturally are drawn to and want to b

Marni welcomes Susan Gulyas to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses the limiting beliefs that hold us back in our life. Susan, a longtime client of Marni’s, is a successful career woman who works as a senior manager in engineering at Boeing. For this episode, they delve into what it means to explore unhealthy patterns and to shift your energy to attract what you want.   *         How to shape your beliefs *         What energy are you putting out into the world? *         Communicating with Integrity   Confront Your Limiting Beliefs [06:48]   We all have stories that we tell ourselves. But sometimes, these stories stem from negative beliefs that have been ingrained in us. Take a moment to reflect on your beliefs about yourself. Are there any limiting ones holding you back?   I believed that I was too old to get married. I believed there was nobody out there for me. And I was not picking well, I was not picking well at all.   Self-Forgiveness Isn’t Just a Buzzword [19:04]   By challenging pas

Marni welcomes Junnie Moon to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into the hidden aspects of ourselves that we often suppress and that influence our behavior and relationships. We suppress these parts of ourselves without even realizing it. Junnie is the CEO of Midlife Love Out Loud. She’s an author, a global love mentor and a certified shadow work practitioner. In this episode, Marni and Junnie discuss what shadow work actually is and how through working on yourself you can find empowerment and authenticity.   *         What is shadow work? *         What are your triggers telling you? *         How to cultivate self-compassion   Are You Self-Sabotaging? [03:33]   We all have blind spots. And these blind spots can show up in several ways including self-sabotage. And these come as a result of not being aligned with our highest and best self.   When we talk about our personalities and how we're showing up in the world, the shadow is a part of us that we want to hide. There's a part of us that m

Marni welcomes Ciicii to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses how to break free from co-dependency and find your own identity. Ciicii is the host of podcast That Bitch Positive. She is a life and energy coach who has millions of followers as well as a singer-songwriter who has a book that came out yesterday with the title “Show Up As Her”. For this episode, Marni and Ciicii discuss the importance of owning your power and becoming the person you’re meant to be. And it starts by letting go of all the external triggers that may be holding you back and taking responsibility for your own feelings.   *         How to let go *         What is co-dependency? *         How to break free from co-dependency   Positive Bitchology  [07:48]   No, it’s not a cocktail. Positive Bitchology is being a babe in true connection with herself. It’s all about finding your way back to who you really are. And you do it by letting go of external triggers, whether that’s a boyfriend or a job.     Step into who you came

Marni welcomes Bobby Frank to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves in the dynamics of a lasting relationship. Bobby who has been married for 31 years is currently working on his book, "The Unimpeachable Wife: Developing a Million Dollar Bank Account and a Million Dollar Family." For this episode, Marni and Bobby discuss the secrets to success and longevity within a relationship.  Self-reflection, authenticity and personal growth are all part of it. When each person focuses on themselves first, it creates a solid foundation for a successful partnership.   *         How to introspect *         What are the ABC’s of marriage? *         How to be Honest   We Need to Talk About Us [04:33]   Don’t focus on the wrong end of the spectrum of marriage or a relationship. The key is to focus on what you both need and want, rather than only prioritizing on your partner.   Don’t violate other principles just because you think something is correct   Honesty Really is The Best Policy [13:14]   It’s been said o

Marni welcomes Nicole Russo to the Life Check Yourself studio. A personal stylist to high-achievers and executives, Nicole opened her own styling shopping service in 2017 and has styled thousands of people since. The duo discusses the most effective way to declutter, how to find your style and why dressing well means being empowered. How you dress, when it’s authentic, is a reflection of who you are and who you want to be.   *         How to dress for power *         Avoid impulse purchases *         How to cleanse your closet   It’s Not Any Less Feminist to Dress the Part [05:11]   The way you dress impacts the way you’re perceived and the way you feel. Fashion can be wielded as a powerful tool to propel your life in the direction that you want it to go in.   You definitely need to be careful in that it has to feel authentic, or else it’s not really going to empower you. It has to feel like you in some way.   Declutter Your Emotions and Your Closet [17:27]   Your closet is a reflection of you. It’s murmurs o

Marni welcomes Shanenn Bryant to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses how to crack the control code and transform the way we view jealousy. Shanenn is a jealousy and relationship confidence expert. She’s also the host of the Top Self podcast and founder of self-development company, Top Self. It’s not just about eradicating jealousy but understanding that this feeling isn’t the problem, but rather a symptom of it. And the answers can be found by examining yourself.    *         Focus on yourself *         Lengthen the space between trigger and response *         How to foster self-awareness   What’s Jealousy Got to Do With it? [05:35]   Jealous stems from somewhere internal, from a place of insecurity. And that could either be because of some type of dysfunction in your childhood or because you went through a bad experience in a romantic relationship. Either way, to understand the feeling itself, you need to look at yourself and ask the right questions.   It doesn’t necessarily have to always

Marni welcomes Paget Kagy to the Life Check Yourself studio. A Korean-American actress, writer, and empowerment coach, Paget is fueled by her passion for challenging societal norms. Paget, a frequency healer and spiritual coach, discusses the significance of operating from a deeper level rather than superficially judging oneself and as a consequence, others as well. The duo speak about the power of detachment and embracing uncertainty to connect with one’s higher self. *         How to dream bigger *         How to identify your blind spot *         Step out of your comfort zone   Are you Hitting a Wall? [11:04]   Energy blocks or energy patterns are basically patterns where you keep hitting up against the same situation. Sometimes, it might be different people or situations but it’s the same pattern over and over again. It doesn’t matter what you try to do,  you end up attracted to those things. And they end up attracted to you.   Un-stuck [14:12]   Sometimes, we don’t even realize that we’re stuck. And that

Marni welcomes Lily Womble to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses what holds successful women back from truly flourishing in the dating world? Lily, who shot to fame after a viral TikTok video is the founder and CEO of DateBrazen.com. She’s helped women overcome personal obstacles to achieve confidence and whole dating lives. It’s not just about finding the right relationship but about understanding what is keeping you stagnating. *         How to live in your main character energy *         You’re not too anything *         Ask for what you want out loud   The Slot Machines of Dating [10:59]   Dating apps are built like slot machines; they’re designed to keep you wanting a little more. They give you just enough of what you need so that you come back for more.   It’s going to give you enough of the good stuff to keep you coming back, but not enough of the good stuff to get you in a relationship.     How to Really Move Forward [18:08]   Getting into the relationship isn’t the prize for heali

Marni welcomes Dr.Heidi Brocke to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into what being toxic actually means. It’s a buzz word that gets thrown around a lot but does anyone really know how to detect a toxic person? Heidi is a toxic relationship awareness and healing specialist. With a podcast that has over 1 million downloads, Heidi has worked with hundreds of people to help them get out of and heal from toxic relationships.   *         What does toxic actually mean? *         How to decode unhealthy dynamics *         How to clean up your social circle   Narcissistic Much? [09:27]   We’ve gotten used to throwing around certain labels and terms without ever actually understanding what they mean. And that includes the word toxic and narcissistic. However, they’re different. Many actually have narcissistic personality disorders because of something in their upbringing or something in their lives that has left them with that insecurity. Knowing the distinction between a disorder and an adjective is

Marni welcomes Anya Chernyshova to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into the process of reinvention. What does it take to completely transform your life? It begins by letting go of the negative beliefs you have about yourself. Anya, who is one of Marni’s long-time clients, went through a reinvention herself where she managed to alter her life to adapt her vision. Understanding that you actually have the power to do it is empowering.   *         Don’t keep it festering *         How to let go of blame *         Forgiveness is key.   Are You Just Being Immature? [10:26]   Change begins when you start loving yourself. This mantra repeated to us over and over again because it’s true. But it’s not enough to just say it, you need to truly believe it. Let go of these negative beliefs you were told about yourself.   It’s such a different way of being when you truly love yourself.   Embracing Self-Advocacy [18:52]   Overcoming your fear and learning to ask for what you need not only helps you overco

Marni welcomes Anapaula Corral to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into feminine energy, recognizing the dating mistakes and letting go of deep-rooted beliefs that may be doing more harm than good. Marni and Anapaula, who is an author, met on Instagram. After that meeting, Anapaula started doing the work with Marni and gaining insight on what it is that she was doing wrong in her dating life. The conversation between the two women explores notions of regained self-confidence, mindful dating, and the journey of self-love.   *         How to define your rules *         Prioritize self-love *         How to embrace your feminine energy   It Starts with a Strong Foundation [11:07]   Regain your self-confidence through self-reflection. Recognize the trauma that you’ve been holding onto and that has been affecting your life. Once you do that, you can begin to work on it and find your way back to your self-confidence.   Deep underneath there’s a shame that needs to be healed.   Own Your Feminine E

Marni welcomes Dr.Abby Mecalf to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo dismantle pre-held beliefs about the secret to a successful relationship. Abby is a psychologist and a relationship maven who also happens to be a podcast host. Throughout this episode, they look into one of the leading causes for the failure of a relationship. And it’s not communication, it’s competition that influences the dynamics within a relationship.    *         Why do so many relationships fail? *         How to stop Comparing *         Find common ground   It’s Actually Not Just About Communication [06:42]  We’ve been told over and over again that the main reason relationships fail is bad communication. But there’s another cancer under that. And it's a competition. This is competition for resources, for time, for money, for things in the family. If you’re in competition with someone, you don’t want them to win.   That Sounds Like a We Problem [12:59] Instead of viewing an issue as one partner’s problem, look at it as a shar

Marni welcomes Dr. Amelia Kelley to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into the notion of gaslighting and how to spot it when it’s happening. Amelia who is a hypnotherapist and an art therapist, discusses the prototypes that are most likely to get gaslit. Dissecting the different types of gaslighting, she explains the personality traits that can play a role in whether or not a person will get gaslit as well as how to avoid a gas-lighter.   *         How to know when you’re being gaslit. *         Stand firm in your truth *         How to distance yourself   Are You Just Being Immature? [07:18]   The term gaslighting gets thrown around lightly, and a lot. However, there are times where it is not a gaslighting situation. You’re just having a disagreement. Gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation and abuse that is intended to control, contort and alter your sense of reality and your sense of self.   There are so many ways it can impact your self-esteem, your interpersonal relationships, y

Marni welcomes endocrinologist and author Dr.Ricky Arenson to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discuss the dynamics between men and women in a partnership. The duo delves into the differences between both genders and how the things that set them apart actually become their strength when combined. While men and women may function on opposing wavelengths, that is actually the key to the success of a relationship. And a happy relationship means a longer life. Longevity isn’t just about eating those berries and that OJ.   *         Uncover your innate qualities *         Why do you keep having the same fights? *         Stop scrolling past everything IRL   Make Love Not War [18:18]   We live in a society where everyone is seeking conflict. And it’s amplified by social media. At the end of the day though, what unites us is our humanity regardless of our race or gender.   We all want to come together and see each other as human beings, and see the value and the beauty of being human rather than dividing

Marni welcomes Julie Hakim to the Life Check Yourself studio for a live coaching session. Julie is a physician who works at Texas Children’s Hospital. For Julie, it is vital for her to step into her power especially since she’s been struggling to feel seen recently. During the session, the duo tackle what it actually means to feel seen and how to regain control in situations that feel unpredictable.     *         What’s your external avatar? *         How to be Seen *         What are energy influencers?     Are You Seen? [01:37]   When you are seen there is a sense of alignment and flow that accompanies that feeling. What are the areas in your life where you feel flow? You recognize it because it is a space of emotional safety.     I think the most immediate response is that I feel I don’t feel vulnerable.   How to Adult [06:40]   Part of becoming an adult is developing roles that you need to fulfill. Those roles differ from person to person. For some, it could be the role of a caregiver, while for others it

Life Check Yourself 436 –  How to Navigate the world of relationship and dating when you’re neurodivergent with Jeremy Hamburg and Ilana Frank   Marni welcomes Friendship and Dating coaches, Jeremy Hamburg and Ilana Frank. Having worked for years towards creating strategies that empower autistic and neurodivergent adults, Jeremy and Llana give in-depth insight on the dating world. The duo has come up with a program, dubbed Social Life 360, that teaches clients to confidently meet new people. In this conversation, they touch on our basic need to connect as humans and what that really means. They delve into the struggles faced when dating and making friends as a neurodivergent person. Much of the advice is applicable to people across the board.     *         How to open your mind *         Why is timing important? *         The Impact of words   Are You Rigid? [11:10]   This rigidity in thinking when it comes to dating is not just limited to neurodivergent individuals. It is something we are all guilty of. And

Marni welcomes transformational speaker and relationship coach, Stephen Muiriri to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses why women feel trapped in certain relationships and how to overcome that feeling and find their authentic value. Stephen has helped thousands of women overcome dating challenges and find true love. In this conversation, he talks about the importance of finding your value and harnessing that energy to communicate it to yourself and those around you. And that value isn’t just limited to the physical, it is much deeper than that. What do you stand for? What are your values? What are your principles? That is where the beauty really is.      How to let go of the past    Rediscover yourself    Take a step back and reassess   The Sum Cost Policy [06:47]   When you continue to invest in something that is failing, the cost starts outweighing the benefits in your mind. And that’s where the challenge lies. It’s what keeps you there despite knowing better.   They think about wh

Marni welcomes one of her clients, Rebecca Purnell to the Life Check Yourself studio. Rebecca shares how she found love. Having had a fulfilling career and what she describes as a great life, she felt something was missing: she couldn’t find her person. Rebecca explains the journey she went through to find her person and the lessons that she learnt along the way. How to date on online apps? Who deserves a second chance and who doesn’t? are just a few of the questions that Marni and Rebecca discuss as they delve into the details of a love story in the digital age.            Take a step back          Ask yourself the right questions          Be curious   Define it then Tear it Down [09:52]   It’s important to look into what are the factors in your past that have created that wall around you. Before tearing it down, you must first define it. When you look into the reasons behind some of your actions, it empowers you to solve them and move forward.   When you just take a pause and find a safe containe

Marni welcomes strategic dating coach, also known as the OG of online dating, Mike Goldstein in the Life Check Yourself studio, where the duo dive into the male perspective of dating and what men are actually looking for when it comes to a partner. What makes them tick? How do they date? Men, like women, are looking for a safe space where they can be themselves. But what does that actually mean? Their conversation touches on cornerstones of what it means to be in a relationship and how to get there. How to be his safe space Speak your mind How to date right   What Does He Really Want?  [16:30]   Men want to feel needed, appreciated, and accepted. They want to show their partner off. But for each man, the definition of that varies. And that definition evolves with age as men start to look at what they really want in a life partner.   So then it’s still showing off, but it becomes less vain. And it’s what would really feel good if a woman has these amazing qualities.   Don’t be the Competition, Be the P