Brown-eyed Jewnicorn

Hannah recaps last week's episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey! She discusses her continued obsession with Jennifer's daughter Olivia, hopes Jackie never refuses sushi ever again, and wants to be besties with Margaret, her Spanx and her extensions ASAP. She also reflects on Thanksgiving, missing her 10-year high school reunion, not understanding TikTok, and gives her thoughts on Jason Mraz! Listen now, and don't forget to head on over to itunes and leave a review. Loveyouthankyou.

Hannah is joined by a gorgeous and hilarious gal from across the pond, Diana Espir! She’s an instagram influencer, self-care guru, and host of the hit pop culture podcast “You Can’t Sit With ME”! They chat about Bravo, astrology, dating, Jojo Siwa and so much more! Listen now, rate, review, and make sure to check out You Can’t Sit With ME for the episode Hannah guested on and more amazing content!

Hannah gives her thoughts on Bravocon, shows Margaret some major love, and continues to butcher Nonno’s accent. (No, really. Brace yourselves. She's really missing the simpler times of doing her Spencer Pratt impression on the reg.) ALSO: As mentioned on the podcast, check out @GOLDHALFMOONCO on instagram to get your very own legit and adorable Blocked By Jax sweatshirt! Support small businesses!

Hannah recaps episode two of RHONJ! She touches on her Chicago trip, improves her Nonno impression (only a little), and falls in love with Melissa's party planner Larry who gives us endless wisdom including but not limited to the phrase "Classy never trashy." Enjoy!

All the way from Chicago, Hannah dives into the season premiere of Real Housewives of New Jersey! She tells the terrifying tale of her flight to the Windy City, celebrates how Jersey is a franchise full of eaters ("I need cheese."), and pitches her reality TV show where all the Bravo Children are plopped on an island a la Lord of the Flies. Listen, rate, review, subscribe, ENJOY!

In a cleansed, post-closet purge state of mind, Hannah is joined by her fabulous pal celebrity stylist (and supremely witty member of the Fashion Police for Us Weekly!) Eric Himel to do a wellness check on Hannah’s time living in LA thus far. They chat about fashion dos and don’ts, getting to a zen state of bitchiness, and how to have an LA glow up no matter where you live or what your budget! Enjoy!

Hannah is joined by hilarious entertainment journalist, cannibis connoisseur and pal Adam Salandra to discuss the iconic Halloween film "Hocus Pocus"! They discuss Hocus Pocus trivia, their Leo/Sarah Sanderson energy, and their childhood attraction to Thackery Binx as both a cat and as a human! Listen now, rate, review, and ENJOY!

Hannah and gorgeous actress, writer and comedian Kym Kral chat about the bone chilling and iconic ghost flick “The Sixth Sense”! They spook themselves with tales of their own paranormal experiences, discuss which ghosts from the movie still haunt them to this day, and yes, they celebrate Mischa Barton in her young, puking, ghostly glory!

Hannah and gal pal/influencer/horror movie fan Becky Habersberger celebrate the iconic 1996 slasher "Scream"! They go in on how Skeet Ulrich is hot but also poor man's Johnny Depp, where Drew Barrymore went horribly wrong at the start of this film, what their favorite scary movies are, and much more!

In this bonus episode, Hannah takes the opportunity to rant about some things that have been bugging her like, really a lot lately. This is what happens when you're "too busy" to observe Yom Kippur. Apologies in advance to anyone who's had a wedding, cut a line, Colbie Caillat, and P!NK.

Hannah and her bestie musician Leo Kidd cozy up to discuss what they love about fall (basic.) and to discuss David Robert Mitchell's cinematic masterpiece "It Follows"! They chat about how to create the perfect Halloween ambience, what they love about the film, AND who they'd risk being followed by a murderous sexually transmitted monster for. Spooky! Listen now, and don't forget to rate and review Brown-Eyed Jewnicorn on itunes!

In the first episode of the Brown-Eyed Jewnicorn October Spooktacular, Hannah recaps season 10 episode 1 of RHONY: Ghouls Just Wanna Have Fun! She goes in on her aspirations to move in with Dorinda in the Berkshires, tells a harrowing college tale about crying into scones, STRUGGLES with her Bethenny and Carole impressions, and tests out an autumnal pumpkin beer! Listen now, head to itunes to rate, review and subscribe!

Hannah is joined by Ben Mandelker, the handsome and hilarious host of "Watch What Crappens" and genius behind the Youtube series "The Real Housewares of Kitchen Island"! They chat about early 2000's pop culture, and Ben tells the amazing story of his personal experience with the cast of The OC! Expect witty banter, inside scoop, and a Shawn Hunter reference or two.

Hannah recounts her recent trip to Napa, her iconic experience at Danny Pellegrino's Everything Iconic live show, and weighs in on Caroline Calloway, Lala vs. Fofty, self care, why Autumn is the best and Summer is the worst, AND the Bachelor in Paradise finale! In short: This is a 45 minute rant. Enjoy!

Hannah is joined by TWO of her pals Lily Comeau and Ryan Bailey to recap this finale extravaganza! TONS to unpack here, so relax, enjoy, and get ready for a Dickie Roberts reference, lots of impressions, our takes on that whole Kaitlynn vs. Ashley situation, and so much more! Make sure to head to patreon.come/browneyedjewnicorn for Pretty Wild bonus episodes! Part 2 begins at: 56:30

Hannah talks about her recent battle with social/career anxiety and self confidence, gives her thoughts on Bachelor in Paradise (Nicole and Kermit Clay need to GO AWAY.), and recaps this week's episode of The Hills where Adrian relaunches her sexy swim line! Listen now and don't forget to rate, review, and head to patreon.com/browneyedjewnicorn for Pretty Wild recaps. Love you thank you.

No new episode of The Hills this week? NO PROBLEM! Hannah dives into the first episode of Whitney Port's 2008 spinoff The City to talk about her recent East Coast state of mind, her fondness for early 2000's fashion, and does a pretty impeccable impression of Whitney's ex/Australian hunk Jay! Listen now, and make sure to head to patreon.com/browneyedjewnicorn for bonus content! Ilysm!

Hannah recaps Speidi's bachelor and bachelorette parties on this week's episode of The Hills: New Beginnings! She also weighs in on the loss of our favorite RHONY Skinnygirl, Bethenny Frankel, as well as tells a dark fashion/wedding-related tale from her past. Rate, review, subscribe, and check out patreon.com/browneyedjewnicorn for TWO new episodes coming at you!

Hannah talks Southern Charm Finale, Bachelor in Paradise, her psychotic spiral in a recent fight with bae, AND that steamy new Calvin Klein ad. Then of course, she recaps the most recent episode of The Hills: New Beginnings! Listen, subscribe, review, rate five stars, and make sure to check out Patreon.com/browneyedjewnicorn for bonus content!

Hannah casually sh*ts herself and fangirls over Euphoria (WE DON'T DESERVE HUNTER SCHAFER), gives her takes on the Caelynn/Blake/Kristina/whoever the f*** else love hexagon on Bachelor In Paradise, and recaps the Thanksgiving spectacular that was this week's episode of The Hills: New Beginnings. Listen, rate, review, subscribe, and make sure to head to Patreon.com/browneyedjewnicorn for bonus content!