Completely Seriously

Folks, remember show and tell? Finding something cool–perhaps a neat rock, and old photo, a scar from your appendix surgery–and showing it to your classmates? This week we’re starting something new. We’re playing show and tell. The show? Fun cool things we found. The tell? Us taking these things Completely Seriously.

Folks, after a long hiatus we’re back with a whole new game plan. That’s right! Y’all spoke and we listened: we are now being Completely Seriously about romantic teen comedies. And this week, we’re starting with the granddaddy of them all: Sixteen Candles.

This week, we’re taking to the sea—the beautiful but treacherous waters of Pandora, that is. Avatar: The way of Water—a sequel 13 years in the making— finally answering the age-old question: can a movie be as long as the waters of Pandora are deep?

As an Academy Award Winner Brendan Fraser stan podcast, we want to bring you the latest and greatest of his work. To that end, this week we’re unpacking his Academy Award winning performance in The Whale. So, come laugh with us, cry with us and emotionally infarct with us.

Quoth the Raven, “we’re back!” That’s right, folks, we uncask-of-amontillado’d ourselves to talk about Pale Blue Eye. This movie— the latest in a long tradition of putting Edgar Allan Poe in the middle of an all too real mystery— begs us to consider a world where literary icons drink themselves silly and solve some crimes.

We’re back with what Joey calls a “podcast” with the first two episodes of Guillermo Del Toro’s Cabinet of Curiosities. Join us on our dive into occult storage unit auctions and grave robbing rats.

Folks, as promised your lovable, hatable Lord of the Rings Lore Respecters are back with the final analysis of Amazon’s Rings of Power. We laughed, we cried, we forged three magic rings for balance. Check it out.

Far over the misty mountains cold, to dungeons deep and caverns old, we set out to dip our toes into the deep lore of Middle Earth and fully dive into the first three episodes of Amazon’s The Rings of Power.

Your sky warriors are back! Gambler, Shadow, Toots and Misty have taken to the skies, dropped the hard deck and performed two miracles to finally bring you our thoughts on #TopGunMaverick.

We’re back in beautiful Sicily this week doing some sexy crimes. We’re tackling the follow-up to 2020’s most harrowingly sexy kidnapping drama 365 Dni: This Day. This one’s got more sex, more spontenaity, more gangster games and no coherent plot.

We’re going back in time to explore a central text for the Treviños. We cover the 2004 Korean classic A Moment to Remember. We’re crying, we’re reading letters dramatically, we’re building dream homes that will never be dreamt and chasing the love of our lives through the haze of fading memories.

We’re attempting the impossible this week. We’re talking about everything. We’re talking about everywhere. Often, we’re talking about it all at once! We watched The Daniels’ latest Everything Everywhere All At Once. This masterpiece is a true multiverse of family, martial arts, existential dread, cosmic bagels, long fingers, feet dexterity, raccoon chefs, rocks that may-or-may-not be alive, and life crushing tax obligations.

This week, we’re breaking down the latest Ti West masterpiece X (2022). Join us for a high minded discussion of agriculture, pornography and the daily struggles of the elderly.

We’ve got a throwback this week as we dive into the 2010 Korean action classic Man from Nowhere and stumble over words like toddlers! Can YOU count all the mistakes?

Folks, we’re BAAAAAck with a movie EWE will have to see to believe. We’re talking 2021’s Lamb and all the RAMifications of isolated livestock farming.

Y’all hear that “vroom vroom” sound? Guess who’s back, back again. Leatherface is back, tell your friend…who’s about to get cut up by a chainsaw. This week, we’re tackling yet another horror classic sequel: Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2022).

We’re going back, back to Woodsboro, Woodsboro, chasing down a whole new set of teens. That’s right, y’all, we’re talking all about the long awaited, fifth installment of the iconic Scream franchise.

Forsooth, sweet Lumpy Dumpies! We’re crossing oceans of salt water AND time this week, tackling The Tragedy of Macbeth. Denzel Washington, Frances McDormand and Joel Coen take a swipe at the crown with the latest cinematic whack at the bard.

We’re bringing The Matrix Resurrections to the Red Table. Join us as we parce the inane from the insane in the long awaited quadequal Matrix Resurrections.

Let the “Festivies” begin! After a brief—well, not brief— hiatus, your favorite cultural analysts are back with a vengeance. We’re doing Christmas right and chopping off big green boy’s heads with A24’s The Green Knight.